Post for the sake of posting....

I realized my last blog was ridiculously long and to create balance, maybe this one will be short. Maybe, but likely not. It doesn't really matter, anyway. I don't think there are too many avid fans of this blog (and I say this with no emo-intent), so I'll do whatever I wanna do! yeah! anarchy! I'm so punk rock.

It is a beautiful Saturday and I skipped attending a charity event I said I would attend. And might I include a charity event for sick children. I'm a horrible human being and will be going to hell. In a hand-basket. Perhaps with a bow. However, I got to sleep-in, so, you know. Take that sick kids.

Also, I am running low on clean underwear and am dropping into the emergency red-zone area of seasonal underwear. It's a Christmas party in my pants. Is it economical or horrifying for me to wear underwear that was actually a part of a skanky Hallowe'en costume?

Anyway, I've started to make to-do lists. First on to-do list: Make more organized to-do lists.

Ode to a Long Weekend

Long Weekend, I hardly knew ye. Honestly, it passed in a huge swoosh and what do I have to show for it? Undone schoolwork and a sore neck (from attempting to dance. Don't ask). I have a love-hate relationship with Long Weekend. I mean, love, for the obvious reasons of sleep, eat, repeat; Hate, because I end up sleeping at the time when I should be waking up which brings me to now. I have class tomorrow and should be asleep but I didn't finished my assignments and now I'm just wasting time (is hadn't a word? I guess not. Thanks spell-check!).

So begins Week 3 of Magazine Publishing. It's been okay so far. I'm not excelling which irks me. It's funny because all of us are focused on one very similar goal and we all write the same assignments and take the same classes. So it's really easy to judge each other. So everyone is super nice but underlying that is this competitiveness. I recently asked this girl what internships she was applying for and she replied "I don't understand your question." OH SNAP. She totally dissed me! You totally understood my question and you totally think I am going to steal your internship... which I totally wanted to do. Oh yeah, it's totally like Devil Wears Prada! hiss!

And you know when you're in a competitive class when people don't tell you their grades. I made the mistake of saying I only got a B and now I will be known as the class dunce. Honestly, I can't break free from the B mold. I'm a perpetual B student. No matter what school I'm in, I always am a B student. Sometimes better, sometimes worse, but to put it more plainly, I'm average. I get by. I am skilled at being okay at lots of things, but never put in that extra mile to be great at anything (Don't say Jack of All Trades. I loathe that phrase). I don't really fret about such matters, but we always seem to be sensationalize those people who excel at one thing. He may be stupid, he may be socially retarded, he may be ugly as heck, but damnit, he can juggle like it's nobody's business. We like our one trick ponies.

But in general, I'm learning a lot. Contemplating places to intern, feeling stressed about applying for internships, feeling anxious about pitching story ideas (due Wednesday. Ahhhh!). I feel like I'm trying to always be on the ball, so every time I pick up a newspaper or magazine lately, I've been thinking "What story ideas can I branch off from here? How did they formulate their hook sentence? What design ideas can I steal?" It's annoying and bothersome, but it's what I have to be doing.

what else, what else, what else. As per usual, I rented movies for Friday:

-The Wrestler: Interesting. I felt it flowed perfectly and that the story went to logical places and was really "full" in terms of content and gave you exactly everything you would want. Unfortunately, I kind of didn't want that much. I mean, it was good. Would I watch it again? No. Interesting story, but not for me. Secondly, please stop using "Vampire Weekend" references in movies. Gawd, they're getting less cool the more you talk about them. And please stop using Evan Rachel Wood for that matter.

-Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon: I want to go back to 2003 and be like "What's the thrill? I don't get it!" I think it was more revolutionary back then. However, a movie has to be really awesome to force me to read subtitles throughout. I think I was just in a cranky, old man type of mood this weekend. There was sort of a parallel to the movies though, which I won't say because it'll ruin one or the other for you. Well, not really. Let's just say, the final scenes are similar. Sort of. Kind of. Okay, okay, it was a well enough movie, but I just had no patience to watch things over an hour this weekend. ADHD, you down wit me.....

Another fun fact is I learned I can run a little farther than i thought. I doubled the length of my run this weekend which was kind of thrilling. I am trying to lean up for an upcoming family reunion (loathe, loathe, loathe) but am thinking of going as a fat arse, but singing a really beautiful song and pull a Susan Boyle (topical humor! lolz!).

Sometimes I run through Central Park and feel like a Disney princess because all the animal follow me. Only I realize they are disease infested with a wild hunger in their eyes. Creepy.

And for that matter, I am surprised to see any species of bird besides a crow anywhere. I have no idea where birds should reside. I saw ducks walking around this schoolyard and though "woah, that's weird". But is it? They fly, so logically, they can be anywhere. And I saw another bird in the woods by my house and was like "woah, coloured!" then realized it was probably like a robin or something. And I saw a goose at a park and once again woah and once again, they fly. Where do you birds belong or do you all just come and go as you please?

Cross-posted from my other blog (I'm a polygamous blogger). Sorry for repeated info (kinda, not really)

Perpetual B-student

My second week of Publishing Program has ended (I should think of a more riveting sentence... think of a good hook to hook in your reader... start with a funny anecdote... but keep it simple...). Lots of info in a short amount of time.... my head is buzzing... how do they cram all that gram? How did that question ever make any sense.

Anyway, I've had some assignments back. I've had pretty "Class Average" marks. I want to excel, damnit. But then, I don't "put in that extra mile" to get the good grades. Sigh. Why can't I just stand out based on my good looks... Honestly, sometimes I feel kind of stuck which sucks. I can't leap over that wall of averageness. I feel like I'm good at a lot of things, but not really great at that many things. I can get by, but that's not really good enough.

In other news, I've decided to re-route myself and take a different bus route. I take this one bus which goes down "the Poor People" street (it's not judgmental if it's true) and a shitload (literally!) of smelly people get on that bus. And now twice I've had to sit beside people who smell like sweat and garbage. Argh! And you know, I know that this happens. I am not trying to be mean, but being trapped in a stink cell, trapped between a wall and a stink lump of a person, really, really, sucks. But I try to be nice. I try to stick it out. I don't want to get up and move.

BUT! Here's a fun tale: So this guy (let's say he's large. Let's say he's massively overweight. Let's say, the bus seats are not equipped for his size) gets on the bus and yeah he's big and that's fine. I can deal with large people sitting next to me. it's fine, it's fine. but! You cannot come in and try to get square footage in my bus seat! Who are, fat Christopher Columbus? Honestly, we should be able to put up mini bus-fences so people DO NOT CROSS THE SEAT LINE. Annoying. It's like really... Do I really want to ride with your big ol' arm jabbing my gut? no. No I do not. Personal space, people! I like mine a whole lot. So he falls asleep, halfway into my bus-seat property and I'm pissed. Do not touch me with your cigarette-smelling jacket. So, I create a "Purse barrier". What to do when you want to keep people out? You build fences. I learned from my Chinese peeps that building a great wall is where it's at. So I put my purse between us (apologizing to my purse for the smell it has to endure) and slowly push him OUT OF MY PROPERTY. This becomes thrilling. It's like sweeping... I push... and push. and.... go to far. He nearly falls out of his seat! Embarrassing (for both of us).

He gets off a few stops earlier (I don't think because of me). And even though I feel bad, the thing is, I don't really. I don't go on the bus to be sat on.

I'm a good person, really.

I'm a Whitney lookin' for a Lauren

Today my first week of Magazine Publishing ended. When people ask me how it's going, it's kind of hard to say because 1/4 of it was a lot of "team building ice breaker games" (ie. "what quirky thing do you have in common?", "what would be your exotic dancer name?"); 1/4 has been review of my BA stuff (if only I had any longterm memory, 50% would probably be review); 1/4 is exciting, 1/4 is unknown, which is the scariest part. Did that even add up right? It's fine, I'm not in a math program... yeahhh...

I'm not sure where I stand, since we haven't been graded yet and I still have that nervousness where I want to do well so badly that I might end up choking. I have no idea where these other students are coming from. WHAT ARE YOUR AGENDAS, FELLOW PUBLISHING STUDENTS? Put a bunch of like-minded students together and it's all well and good until you figure out what the hierarchies are. I just want to be the awesomest. Is that too much to ask?

At a more basic level, everyone seems relatively nice and the campus smells like Cedar (and sometimes garbage)? I've been getting around okay (mostly because my colleages lead me around) however I got lost once attempting to follow someone to the bus loop, only to realize I was following them to their car. AWKWARD.

It's tiring though. Even though my hours are shorter, I'm not used to waking up at 630am regularly. I've never had to, so, yeah. But it's been okay so far. You'll see, in a couple of weeks I'll be swearing and cursing transit because I keep waking up too late and they don't pick me up.

I think that's all for now... must sleep. oooh. I've been up for 21 hours. sweet. Shall I attempt to go for 24?